The Judgemental Me.

The Bright spot on ever dark body is one to be intrigued upon, but a black spot on a seemingly, high voltage, bright body would  be viewed with a wide skepticism. A glass being half filled would be looked on with optimism by a thirsty traveller but a notion of half empty glass being stirred in first, would surely hurt his thirst at that very instant. A holistic picture does occur but after our due share of judgements and prejudices. The time exactly between the initial reaction to a final conclusion, a person can go deep down the evaluation line, swimming in the transfusion between waters of scepticism and optimism. And fodder of thoughts which follow are hard to go by, adding on to one’s evaluative world.

Does the pessimism come to humans naturally or is it fed into our system, may be in relation with the cultural moorings which one grows up in. The evaluation begins with oneself as the society keeps unfurling more and more with each day of our lives. Gradually shifting or simultaneously evolving into a general rating system, thus accepting the status quoist line of the society.

But the wonderful aspect of one’s life is that we are continuously evolving and becoming a better person with every passing day. The line or the ratings keep getting rational to an extent of disappearance of the already blurred lines. Every scenario is seen in an independent frame of mind, giving the judgement a considerable time before it finally occurs.

The Judgemental Me is a satire on our society which has become more and more judgemental and biased in its opinion, with prejudices rocking our already sinking boat. There are innumerable perspectives around us which we have to find time to look into and get a rational teeth in order to bite us in, if we start getting over-judgemental about the people around, including oneself. We have been alienated from ourselves from the moment we had started putting on the veil of prejudice that had been handed to us from our environment. It’s better to break these shackles to realise our the oneness among many, and most essentially reuniting with oneself.

#BreakFree.

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Musical Series: Aap Ki Nazron Ne Samajha.

A revisit, A revamp; And the musical journey continues.

Aapki Nazron ne Samjha ~ Singer: Latha Mangeshkar; Movie: Anpadh (1962); Language:Hindi.

The song has some wonderful wordings which emphasize on the purity of love, therefore rendering a translation to the song has become a lot more difficult. Hoping to strike the cord with the lyrics, which had spellbound me into a mist of romance, with a few add-ons from my side; the translation goes something like this..

Your eyes have understood me as worthy of your love, my heart tries to wane away as it has found it’s destiny which has always been you. Every glance of mine towards you has that thanking decor for accepting me for who I am. The smile of acceptance, the sigh of shyness and giggle of expectation has made my heart skip a beat in turn. The violins have been on a continuous play ever since, and the happiness has only increased. I ask my heart to go to rest as I have found you and you have found me. 

Newer version of the song is worth listening, though the older version is priceless. Attaching a link for the newer version.

http://www.gaana.com/album/aap-ki-nazron-ne-samjha-hindi

“Music is what feelings sound like” – Anonymous!

Maria’h Diaries – The Nature’s Fury.

City of Maria’h 

21st September 2021

Drops of previous shower had stayed back on the leaves with the clouds staying on their agreed location and thereby not allowing the great sun to rise through. Darker the clouds became, intense the sound had become; a thunder after thunder rattled the roofs. But the dew which had settled in wasn’t because of this, not even remotely connected to this. The nature was saddened by the grief of a middle-aged man whose tears haven’t dried up either and have stayed put. The wind seemed to have come to a standstill, and the darkening of the cloud provided a shadow over the man like a protective mother.  And the clouds clashed again to see thunder resonate with grief. 

One sudden day when things were thought to have been stabilizing, a small lightning had wrecked a house and killed all the people inside. Wreckage wasn’t restricted to only the people but also a person who had arrived a day later to see his fate crumble to dust. He had lost his everything, his daughter, his wife; the only persons who he really cared about and lived for.  

Holding a doll in his hand which he had promised his daughter to get from the town, he just couldn’t raise his head to look above and even curse the Gods who had done this to him. He wept till the time he lost his consciousness and kissed the ground to take him to heaven, to be reunited with his family. But the ground wasn’t strong to send him there, so they decided to march him as a soldier of their own. The person rose from the ground after a few hours, to cry some more and fall down again. Finally, he stood his ground to realize that the reason behind the anomalies wasn’t the nature but the man himself. And the soldier which the nature dreamt of and had been weeping for, had started to take his baby steps in the direction to save them from further humiliation.

Afternote: The conditions of the place wasn’t like this always, however the climate was deteriorating with the rising pollution which had already reached the threshold levels. But the process of deterioration got its impetus from the series of nuclear tests that were conducted a few years ago. The misery, which was thought to have ended with the test, had only aggravated with time as they had to get ready to face one of the worst furies of nature that the mankind had ever seen.

The Ruffling of a Wind.

The winds in my head, sometime they reign strong while sometimes act as if they never existed. Ruffling the concentrating brain, breaking the tired hope, dictating its terms to my senses. Biasing every view i see, steering away the purity and making the brain dip continuously in the unholy waters of embarrassment. The winds carry the moments of despair once faced or the possible future situation which are likely to affect, bringing a screen of sadness and enveloping the entire mood into it.

What shall i do? shall i be left conquered? shall i move or watch with silence as the winds destroy every castle of my dream? What shall i do?

Watching oneself get bloody, though the ooze is not visible but only felt, then pleading with the wind to spare the most desired castle of yours. Crying your hearts out, but the sense of helplessness sinking in; Tears slowly start disappearing and madness starts to follow. The castle of my dream, my possible destiny, can i let it be destroyed. It’s as if you lift the weapon to fight for your last breathe of freedom and happiness. The blood has oozed so much, that you fail to notice it anymore while the sight remains fixed on the half destroyed castle as if there is nothing more to live about. You start running towards the possible doom, the powerful wind, which might destroy you but believe me there is nothing left to be destroyed. As you start your sprint, the air starts flowing behind you, an anti wind. Closing in on the distance, there is a slow and steady flight into air, the anti wind had become like the magic carpet of our dreams.

The anti wind becomes a speeding razor, cutting across the wind and clearing the dark clouds around. As we lay our eyes on the destroyed castle, there is a new wind ruffling your ears now, ” We can make a new one, master”.

Inspiration behind the post: “Once you leave away all the ones which weigh you down, your start feeling your wings and the flight to destiny becomes just a matter of time”. 

 

The Diaries of Maria’h – 1.

August 26th, 2027 

Blissful morning which has set in after a rainy night, the fragrance of the air which fills in every house of Maria’h has always brought a smile on my face. But that wasn’t the reason i was smiling, it was because of my daughter who was only born a day ago. Those tiny hands and the little nose, which actually resembled mine, was making me wonder at the most beautiful person i have ever seen. Taking her on my hand and laying close to my chest and whispering in her ear “Daddy is going to take care of you till his last breath, and from now on everything which he will do is for you and your mom”.  Keeping her close and watching her sleep on my shoulder, and then my eyes drifting up to the sky to thank that person who is far away from us, and the reply appears with a tinkle in the sky. 

Happiness is always available in discreet packets which vaporize after a while and would be needed to be filled up again, every day, every hour or maybe every minute. It was no different with me too, the promise which i made to my daughter, i could never fulfill and that makes me grieve more than anything.

Its only been a decade since these anomalies have set in, the fragrance, the bliss, everything seems to have disappeared in the wild dust which has enclosed the city. Watching Lisa’s reflection on the glass shade, watching her sleep makes me realize that i have a chance to redeem myself. And I wonder, how is that possible? Nature has unleashed its fury, and mankind has been left with no option other than to sit and watch the crumbling or the new beginning.

The Gorgeous One.

Dream World ~Indeed The Virtual One.

“Love is found everywhere, we just need to wear the right glasses.”

Waiting in the balcony for the sun to graze the surface and the light getting lost in the wilderness, the wait seemed not alone as the birds chirped away which made noises that got synced with dimming light. Eyes as they followed the setting sun, only to be obstructed by a building exactly opposite to mine, there stood the person who swept me off my feet. She was so beautiful, that words might fall short to describe her. I waived at her, not knowing how i got so much of courage to even lift my hand! She seemed amused and noticed after 2-3 waives, finally responding by a delicate smile which was quite measured in intention. Having no idea what to do ahead, i tried waving again, until she disappeared in darkness. Power Cuts have become reduced, but i was really upset at that very minute, it had been only 10 minutes since i saw her. There was a sudden anxiety to see her again. Counting every second in between the disconnect, finally getting a relief after an hour when the power made its much awaited return. The disappointment of the day hadn’t ended, it just began. To my displeasure and grief, she wasn’t there.

As I lay on my bed, trying to recollect the beautiful smile which usually got mystified and the clarity always seemed lacking, the door bell rang.

It has been only two days since we moved in to the locality, the suburbs of Bangalore was a phase of refreshment away from the city sounds and pollution. I had another two weeks before i had to leave for joining the unfortunate company which i was going to be employed in.  And most important, this is a dream, welcome aboard. 

The office hours had seemed to get boring with the hours piling on one after the other, while i was still lost in thoughts about the mystery girl. After a while I realized, that there was a party this weekend and I have been invited which i had failed to hear due to my silly day dreams.

The place had been filled in with people and the music if played for longer than an hour might make one or two deaf for sure. In midst of everything, I sat down with a peg of vodka in my hand, which i believe was my sixth or may be seventh. So, in short was inexplicably high and there sat a girl in front who in my obvious senses i failed to recognize. She was sitting and just observing what i was upto, but in the few instance that are recorded in my head, she seemed a familiar face.

The next morning always followed with the most painful of headaches and always an owe to never drink again – a hypocritical statement. Reaching office on time seemed to be a pain but had to, at least for the salary as about the job i cared none. I never wanted to be a person stuck to his computer all day long, but being unclear about my other talents or interests had to settle with this one and also it gave me time to find the passion in life. Getting back to the day, as i was back in the office, i had found a note attached to my desk consisting of someone’s cell number. Intrigued with the number and the identity of the person, I decided to give a call but only to be unanswered.

A voice from behind, “Aakash, are you alright? You had a lot yesterday but what interested one n all was that you were having a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the party. How do you know her….” I could hardly remember anything, except the thought of her and she resembling to someone I had already seen.

The phone rang, and the same number as in the note, I picked up having a half thought resting on what happened yesterday. I almost missed the name of the other person, but caught on the last minute, Meera she said. I was confused, and replied ” Do i know you?”

Waiting at the coffee place, where every minute seemed like an hour not dying to be passed about with. Then she appeared from the door, and mind you I couldn’t take my eyes off her and kept following her until she reached the table. She sat down, and had to waive to disconnect me and speak.

“I thought you remembered me” she said. “Alcohol makes things extremely blurred and even missing from the thought of mind, I am really sorry” I said in reply. And the conversation seemed to never end, it still hasn’t.

She told me, the day we first saw each other, she had returned to balcony to find no one as we had different phases of light, one coming before the other. And the day where i was too lazy to open the door and busy day dreaming, it was she who had rung the bell. Even on the day of the party, she was about to leave when she saw me and decided to stay on.

Thinking about so many striking coincidences, we may wonder whether these things do happen in reality. I had already told you guys the most important thing, Its a dream and you all are already aboard. So to see what is in store in reality, people please wake up 🙂

The Evergreen Song.

Syncing in with dissimilar tastes of melody and the melancholy of the beautiful song, words just run through the fingers to create something beautiful. There are different moods which a simple song conveys to us. Lets rest upon a few to get a sincere view of that evergreen song which runs wide in our life.

A growing reverence of solitude as the days pass by, we come more closer to the reality of what we are and what constraints we possess within. Sheer notion of being truly free, allows one to do that little ‘kamaal’ (wonderful act) in life which ultimately grows upon us to become a way ahead.

Act of craziness, a famous quote which i recollect said something like this ” If you were never crazy in life, then i believe you never lived one”. This is when we reach the pinnacle of a mood change; here, exactly here, we know the levels of craziness we can put ourselves in. Mostly, in my opinion, they are indeed embarrassing but yet we need to accept as it is none but us. Sometimes, the best fun possible is also had in those moments.

State of normalcy, its becoming part of the society which we once left; it happens slowly with understanding and experiences. The mundane part of life becomes consciously entrenched similar to the stanzas of a song which are repeated para after, as if we are waiting for that change in tune to bring back our senses, that we are indeed listening to a song.

So how does the song end? Does it really end? Or chimes still ring abuzz in our heads? I believe it doesn’t end, its evergreen as it becomes part of us. The state of normalcy is achieved, and its purpose achieved with nothing left for the song to do. But there is this wonderful saying I heard from King Khan himself, “Jo Kuch Nahi Karte, Woh kamaal Karte he” ; It means ” the ones who do nothing, end up doing something really wonderful”. Every song is magical and every word has a meaning which we connect with life, its always been and it will always be my lifeline to writing.

 

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